The feeling is mutual, but it still hurts.

I regret to say that I'm not willing to supervise you any more on
research projects.

Decisions, Decisions.

I need to decide what I'm doing for next fall. I received a renewal of my BICB traineeship, but am not going to be working with my "current" adviser next fall, so I let it expire. This means I'm crossing my fingers, toes, and hair for a TA position, although I was told it was "highly unlikely" that I'd receive one.

My options:
1. Get a TA position and continue school in the fall
-Decide whether to do a Ph.D. or a masters
2. Take out loans and push hard to finish a masters
3. Get a "real" job
4. Get an internship and work on a masters

In any case, it doesn't look like I'll be getting a Ph.D. unless I can find another adviser at the U that is willing to fund me. *sigh*

I need to go meet with a department adviser to give them my options. Maybe they can provide some real advice, or at least change my enrolled program to Master's. Otherwise, I am going to need to take the Ph.D. qualifying written exams (I posted about this previously).

Gotta get this figured out soon, it's already the end of July.

"Cat Call Coerces Can Opening" and Annoying Alliteration

Cat Call Coerces Can Opening

Seems like my cats are actually controlling me through high frequency purr-waves. My cats aren't all that demanding... but they do purr a lot. Hmm...

Summer's already half way over (or there abouts)

I can't believe it is already the middle of July. Where has my summer gone? My summer has gone to video games, working, and late nights with Moose. As he and I sat and talked about what was going on for the rest of the summer, we realized that the remainder of our weekends were booked... and there weren't very many of them.

July 18-19 : Duluth (possibly)
July 25-26 : Alexandria and Indiana
August 1-2 : ??
August 8-9 : AWOL LAN
August 15-16 : Dad's birthday, possible trip for Moose
August 22-23 : Tara's birthday, CALIFORNIA TRIP
August 29-30 : ??
September 5-6 : Gettin' ready for school
School starts: September 8th

This is, of course, assuming I am even going to school in the fall. Speaking of which, I need to figure that out. I received funding through BICB again, but that would mean I would have to work with my ex/current adviser. It seems he does not wish to work with me, and I am not exactly thrilled about possibly working with him again. Sometime next week, I need to speak to an adviser in the department about if I could finish a masters degree next school year. At least that way, I could have something to show for this year. I'll keep the internet posted.

In other news, I'm currently being tested for every ailment under the sun involving an upset stomach and dizziness. This includes intestinal parasites, anemia, and celiac disease. The general feeling right now is that I have some sort of gluten allergy. I'm not so sure anymore, but hopefully they discover something that can be treated. I'm tired of feeling sick to my stomach and like I can't string four words together to save my life. I *do* get to poop in a tube and bring it to the hospital :-p. Oh so looking forward to that.

Back to work, gotta make the moneyz.

Basement Jaxx - Raindrops

In a desert
You're standing
A silhouette
In motion

On the glory afternoons in June I need you
Just like raindrops (Just like raindrops)
You'll feel so good upon my lips
Just like raindrops (Just like raindrops)
Even though you're a million miles away

There's a space out there
And then when we can move

On the glory afternoons in June I need you
Just like raindrops (Just like raindrops)
You'll feel so good upon my lips
Just like raindrops (Just like raindrops)
Even though you're a million miles away
Just like raindrops (Just like raindrops)
You feel so good upon my lips
Just like raindrops (Just like raindrops)
Even though you're a million miles away

You taste so great, on my lips
You taste so good, on my lips
Your moisture drips upon my lips
Just like a waterfall, straight through the heart of me

Raindrops
Raindrops
Raindrops, raindrops
Raindrops, raindrops
Raindrops, raindrops

Just like raindrops (Just like raindrops)
You'll feel so good upon my lips
Just like raindrops (Just like raindrops)
Even though you're a million miles away
Just like raindrops (Just like raindrops)
You'll feel so good upon my lips
Just like raindrops (Just like raindrops)
Even though you're a million miles away

When I want you, I'll follow you
I'll follow you
When I want you, I'll follow you
I'll follow you

Phoenix - Lisztomania

So sentimental
Not sentimental no !
Romantic not disgusting yet
Darling I’m down and lonely
When with the fortunate only
I’ve been looking for something else
Do let do let do let jugulate do let do let do
Let’s go slowly, discouraged,
Distant from other interests
On your favorite weekend ending
This love’s for gentlemen only
That’s with the fortunate only
No I gotta be someone else
These days it comes it comes it comes it comes it comes and goes

Lisztomania
Think less but see it grow
Like a riot, like a riot, oh !
I’m not easily offended
It’s not hard to let it go
From a mess to the masses

Lisztomania
Think less but see it grow
Like a riot, like a riot, oh !
I’m not easily offended
It’s not hard to let it go
From a mess to the masses

Follow, misguide, stand still
Disgust, discourage
On this precious weekend ending
This love’s for gentlemen only
Wealthiest gentlemen only
And now that you’re lonely
Do let do let do let jugulate do let do let do

Let’s go slowly, discouraged,
We’ll burn the pictures instead
When it’s all over we can barely discuss
For one minute only
Not with the fortunate only
Thought it could have been something else
These days it comes it comes it comes it comes it comes and goes

Lisztomania
Think less but see it grow
Like a riot, like a riot, Oh !
I’m not easily offended
It’s not hard to let it go
From a mess to the masses

Lisztomania
Think less but see it grow
Like a riot, like a riot, Oh !
I’m not easily offended
It’s not hard to let it go
From a mess to the masses

Grizzly Bear - While You Wait For The Others

Another great song from Grizzly Bear's Veckatimest. I really need to buy this album.



while you wait for the others
to make it all worthwhile
all your useless pretensions
are weighing on my time
you could beg for forgiveness
as long as you like
or just wait out the evening
and always ask me why
yes you'll only leave me dry
so I'll ask you kindly to make your way

and what was there
the perfect glare
we all fall through

while you wait on the answers
that I'll pretend to find
keeping up with emotions
still occupies our time
you could hope for substance
as long as you like
or just wait out the evening
and always ask me why
yes you'll always ask me why
I'll ask you kindly to make your way

and what was left
the perfect glare
we all fall through

and all we want

and what was there
and what was there
and what wasn't there

Fowrhth

In case you missed it, the United States of America became an even older biddy than she was previously. 233 years have made this country fat and ugly. On Saturday, we decided to shoot fireworks in an attempt to whip up the energy to motivate America to get up, get dressed, and go look for a job.

Anyway I'll stop with that now. I went to Duluth for Independence Day. My friend Emily was in town, so she and roomie Kat joined me and Tara for a day at my parent's house. My dad cooked a wonderful smoked pork roast. Unfortunately, due to my newly discovered gluten allergy,** I am unable to eat barbecue sauce. So, ma decided we needed to run to the COOP (or as she says, "KWAP") to find some gluten free sauce. Half an hour later, we walked out with Peanut Butter Panda Puffs, Smorables, Cherry Cream Blue Sky, Frozen Gluten Free Flax Bread, a Lemon Angel Pie (imagine a lemon meringue pie with a meringue crust)... and no barbecue sauce. We got back to the house and drew aquatic animals on the driveway. Emily later drew a dragon. It's kind of her thing.

Duluth has amazing fun things to do on the fourth, including "Fourth Fest." This year, complete with a crappy traveling carnival. We ventured downtown and purchased copious amounts of candy and fried deliciousness (which I could not eat) and cat rubber ducks. Upon returning home, Destiny and Joe had arrived and it was time for food. I lit a candle for the year anniversary of my grandfather's death while we sat outside and watched Destiny play in a sled full of sand ("It's like a mobile sandbox" my mom exclaimed. "It's like sand from my trunk put into a sled you stole from me the year after I bought it" I corrected her. "Oh, you didn't need it anyway.")

Instead of watching the fireworks at the 'rents place, Em, Kat, Tara, Alyssa and I joined Alyssa's friends on the beach of Wisconsin Point. This is the stinky brother of Minnesota Point, more commonly known as Park Point in Duluth. You drive past a landfill on the way to the beach. Nothing can be more pleasant than that. Complete with a fire and a keg, we watched Duluth's apparent "SECOND MOST EXPENSIVE IN THE COUNTRY***" fireworks display. It wasn't very thrilling. The mortars shot above our heads by the fellow beach patrons were more exciting and better to watch.

We headed back to Minneapolis the following morning. No stay in Duluth is too short.

(**not yet tested by a medical professional)
(***as stated by my father, not verified at this point)

Mos Def - Casa Bey

Mos Def - "Casa Bey" - The Ecstatic - 6.9.09