Thoughts on Gradschool (Part 4 of Many)

Events of late have made me ponder my existence as a graduate student at the University of Minnesota. In my opinion, I have been failing most splendidly at adopting the life of a grad student. Granted, the flooding in my office and other events in my life have not helped, but I can't use that as an excuse. I must be willing to devote myself entirely to my research. I must be willing to spend all day, every day, in my office, at my computer, working. Thinking about new ideas... developing new software... forgetting about friends and fun and food.

For the first month or so of this semester, I have rarely spent a full day in my office. A full day to me involves coming in during the morning, before a first class, and staying until at least dinner time. Last semester, I was in my office (not including class time) from approximately 9 or 10 am to 9 or 10 pm. Full day, me working... not necessarily enjoyable, but that was mostly because I'd forget to bring food.

I dunno. Is this a sign? Do I really not feel attached to my work? Do I even belong in graduate school? My classes frustrate me, my adviser pisses me off, my research is going nowhere... *sigh*

I apologize to blog readers for this rant.

I need to get my head on straight and decide what the fuck I am doing. And soon...